Racing a quantum computer through Minkowski spacetime

The Lorentzian length of a timelike curve connecting both endpoints of a computation in Minkowski spacetime is smaller than the Lorentzian length of the corresponding geodesic. In this talk, I will point out some properties of spacetime that allow an inertial classical computer to outperform a quantum one, at the completion of a long journey. We will focus on a comparison between the optimal quadratic Grover speed up from quantum computing and an n=2 speedup using classical computers and relativistic effects. These results are not practical as a new model of computation, but allow us to probe the ultimate limits physics places on computers.